Friday, June 21, 2013

“My Favorite Console of This Generation is…”

I have a lot of people asking me now that this generation of consoles is coming to an end, which one was my personal favorite…well okay no one really asked me that…I just figured I would tell you anyway.

I’ve been a Nintendo fan from day one…even held out on buying a Playstation one and two (when they were the cool things to have) just to support the big N and their N64 and Gamecube. Link, Mario, Samus…I loved them all…I even used to dream about being Mr. Aran (of course I would take her last name because she can kick my ass) when I grew up.

Then along came the Wii…a lot of fun at first…but shortly after my hundredth game of bowling it kind of got old and stale…like what happens to a fruitcake after Christmas. I don’t know…it may be because I’m lazy…but the whole motion control gaming thing was a novelty that way over stayed its welcome…and even in some case made a game that should be fun and relaxing a whole lot more work than necessary.

Now I’m not hating on the Wii or anything like that…it had its moments and its fair share of good games…but needless to say it wasn’t my favorite console from this generation.

Next console to be voted off of cyber island would have to be the Xbox 360. Just like with the Wii…I didn’t hate the 360 but it did leave little to be desired…at least for me anyway. Its exclusive didn’t really do anything for me…at least not their “AAA” exclusives like Halo, Fable and Gears of War…they were fun and all but just not my cup of tea.

Gears of War felt as if I was playing as the jocks that used to beat me…or um I mean the nerds up back in school. I spent more time letting the enemies kill me just so I could watch those ‘roid heads die. I know that sounds sadistic and even borderline nuts…but what can I say, I just looked at it like reverse cyber bullying with me on the giving end of a serious butt kicking.

Halo…not a bad game per se…I mean the single player campaign was decent…but the multiplayer component made me want to smash my face with a hot iron then soak it in alcohol. I know some would say just don’t play online…but then you’re missing out on all the fun…or so I thought.

When playing online I get smoked like a cigar all the time…and not because I suck…well okay it is partly because I suck but the other part is because people are bouncing around all over the place like as if they were in one of those bouncy houses at a kids birthday party.

I didn’t like those stupid things when I was a kid (because I was never invited to anyone’s party who had one…or anyone’s party who didn’t have one for that matter)…so why would I want to play in one now…especially with weapons blasting and people who are trying to kill me dead.

Then of course when I “make my team lose” I get cussed out by people who sound like they just sucked the helium out of a balloon…oh so much fun. What kind of sadist am I, to pay for people to freak out on me and tell me that I am a loser…I can get that for free just by going over to my parents’ house.

Now for Fable…well my momma used to tell me if I can’t say something nice then don’t say anything at all…so onto my number one…

Which of course, due to the process of elimination is obviously OnLive…what a true diamond in the rough…what a real hidden treasure…what an honest to goodness piece of poop.  What a joke of a system that was…now I don’t know whose bright idea that was, but they should be beaten with a wiffleball bat.

My number one is the PS3 of course…my only real friend…it’s such a head ripping off shocking trash people alien shooting good time. I had a blast with the PS3…so many great memories, fun times and off the chain nerd rages. Honestly if it was possible to marry an inanimate object I would so become one with the PS3…I think she has a hot disk slot huh huh.

I loved Sony’s exclusives this generation…they were lots of fun and very entertaining…even if some of them were ideas taken from Nintendo games. They made sure to have all their bases covered; there was a little bit of everything for everyone, from action adventures to RPGs...they did their best to not leave anyone feeling neglected.

I also enjoyed the cast of characters that showed up in these games…I thought they were interesting and a blast to play…very memorable and unique in their own way. Sony’s character lineup is second only to Nintendo’s in my book…and with each passing generation they’re getting closer and closer to being my new number one.
I am also a fan of their hardware; the operating system is very easy to use and straightforward, I don’t know maybe it’s because I’m old and my senses aren’t what they used to be, but I enjoyed it. The controller is my favorite of this generation mainly because it hasn’t really changed all that much since it first came into the game…which again, is great for old timers such as myself.

Well there you go people…my number one…so what do you think?


Friday, June 14, 2013

“I’m a Cyber-Hoarder”

When it comes to games like Skyrim and Fallout, I have a problem…I’m a cyber-hoarder. Now this may not seem like a big deal to some…but I know it’s not a good thing…and to a certain extend it hinders my gameplay experience.

I find myself looting everyone and anything I can get my grubby little hands on…taking things I don’t need and most likely will never use. I take so much crap that my guy can’t even run…he’s walking along like a snail…and very well equipped snail…but nevertheless still a snail.

I’m killing everyone I come across…friend or foe it doesn’t matter…because when they’re lying on the ground dead I can loot them and that’s all that matters. Am I sick…maybe…am I crazy…most likely…but do I have a lot of fun while doing it…heck yeah I do.

I also make sure to have a dwelling in these games…and not so that I am protected from the elements and the dangerous that lurk…but so I have a place to store my stuff. I find that I spend just as much time sorting through my stuff…as I do playing the game…and that is not good.

I got chests, dressers and closets full of useless crap…some of which is really cool and probably would have been a lot of fun to use while playing…but oh well at least I had it all stored away nice and safe…all thanks to my stupid obsession.

You want to know how bad I have it…I’m even carrying and storing things I know have absolutely no use and/or value whatsoever…things like eating utensils, random clothes and even empty bottles. I even have a special place for this stuff in my’s like the junk drawer in the kitchen…and I’m ashamed to admit it’s full.

What am I to do…I know they have TV shows for real life hoarders…but what about us cyber-hoarders…where can we go for help!? Is there a YouTube channel, Facebook or even a MySpace that can help people like me…or am I just out of luck?

How can someone overcome this obsession…there are so many cool gadgets, gear and weapons to collect in these games and I want it all…even if I don’t use any of it. I know some would say just stop…but that is a lot easier said than done. Some may also say to not play games like Skyrim and Fallout…and my response to them would be, “yeah right”…these games freaking rock.

I guess I will just continue down the path I’m on…regardless of how destructive it is. I know I’m wasting a lot of time by playing this way…but I’m okay with that…because when all is said and done it is actually a lot of fun. Don’t ask me why…because I don’t know…it just feels right.


Tuesday, June 11, 2013

"Buried Treasures"

Now that the next generation of consoles is right around the corner…it’s time to make sure you played every game worth playing from this generation before moving on to the latest and greatest. There are a lot of hidden gems out there…across every platform…from arcade racers to first-person shooters (FPS) and everything in-between...and if you haven't played them shame on you.  
These games are worth playing…and at the cost…totally worth picking up. Some of these games you can get for next to nothing…which if you ask me, is a good thing…especially considering all the value you’ll receive by playing them.
Now I’m not saying these will all be “AAA” titles…with beautiful graphics and Hollywood caliber stories…but I am saying for the current price they would be an awesome gaming experience worth having and a great addition to any collection. Believe it or not...amongst all those "AAA" games out there...there are so really good games that didn't get the recognition they deserved...buried treasures if you will.
Here are some first-person shooters that are really good…and just remember that a game doesn’t have to have “Call of Duty” in the title for it to be worth playing…not hating on Call of Duty…just saying.
Like action-adventure games…with lots of bullets flying and sword slashing fun that delivers an adrenaline pumping good time…well then check out these titles.
Looking for a little more story with your hack and slash and/or bullet popping fun…then check out these titles.
What about arcade racers…you like them…you know the ones that aren’t trying to be all about the graphics and the cars and less about the gameplay.

There are even some really good superhero movie tie-in games...I know crazy right.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Captain America: Super Soldier

Now I’m sure there are more hidden gems out there…but these are only the titles I’ve played and that I feel didn’t get the love (or the sales) they deserved.