Would you do, and by do I mean get it on like Donkey Kong, a superhero and/or supervillain if you had the opportunity?
Now of course we’re just talking about getting busy with these heroes/villains, because we all know the majority of them are not relationship material, and not just because of their job, but because most of them are whiny little bitches and have more drama in their lives than a daytime soap opera.
When they are not out saving the world, or trying to take it over, they are looking to get their freak on just like any other individual with their junk intact, or not suffering from a “debilitating headache” **cough** women **cough** would.
There are the obvious few that just about everyone and their mother would bang, for example Superman, Catwoman and even Aquaman, that is if you don’t mind a man who smells like fish…what a switch that would be, am I right guys. *raises hand for a high-five and gets no love*
However, what about the crazy mutated bastards, those who are considered super due to their special gifts but aren’t necessarily someone who you would see in the pages of People’s hottest man/woman alive issue, super powers but not super looks.
Would you be okay with Killer Croc going down South on you, getting a handjob by Lady Deathstrike or even letting the Incredible, and I emphasize the word incredible, Hulk give it to you, that monstrosity (you know, the beast that’s hiding inside those purple shorts) would destroy any orifice it attempted to penetrate…think about it people, if the muscles grow like that what do you think happens with the rest of the body parts.
I’m sure there are some freaky superhero/supervillain groupies out there who have a fetish for that kind of thing, but I would say for the most part, it’s few and far between, but then again what do I know I never thought defecating on someone would be consider hot but to some it’s all the rage.
You also have those everyday average Joes and Joans who get no love because either their powers suck or they just look like someone you would see on a show on the FX network, nothing all that special if you catch my drift.
Although thinking about it, consider all the new positions and things you could try being with someone like the Green Lantern (imagine of all the fun you could have with that ring), the tiny superheroine known as Wasp or even the super stretchy Mr. Fantastic who’s guaranteed to meet any woman’s manhood requirements if you know what I mean.
For obvious reasons I wouldn’t recommend wasting your time with the Flash, things would be over before they even got started, not only that but with things moving that fast you’re sure to see chafing in areas you that really wouldn’t want to.
Who knows, maybe there is something to being with those less than desirable types, and for the record when I say “less than desirable types” I’m not talking about those crazy mutated bastards like I mentioned prior, no Hellboy and/or one of those Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for me, I don’t want those funky looking mofos anywhere near me regardless of what special ability they could bring to the bedroom.
Side note, when one does the deed with one of the bat folk (Batman, Robin or Batgirl) do you think those “fighting bubbles” pop up like in the old television show, you know like blam, pow and bang?