Friday, March 27, 2015

“WWE WrestleMania 31 Breakdown”

Considering that I’m a wrestling fan, been so since the 80s (What’cha Gonna Do Brother), and considering that WrestleMania is this weekend, their biggest pay-per-view of the season, I decided I should write about it and share my thoughts.

We all know it’s fake and scripted, kind of like politics, but it is still a lot of fun, at least to me it is.

Here’s my rundown of all the matches and my thoughts as to who will win each match and why.

Kickoff Pre-show: Fatal 4 Way for the WWE Tag Team Titles: The Usos vs. Los Matadores vs. Big E and Kofi Kingston vs. Cesaro and Tyson Kidd:

The only tag team in this match I care for are The Usos, I think they are incredible performers with a lot of talent.

I don’t see them winning the match though, it just doesn’t seem like it would be “best for business” as The Authority would say.

With the Usos out of the mix, I don’t really care who wins this one, because I’m just not a fan of any of the three teams left.

However, if I had to pick I would say let Cesaro and Tyson Kidd keep the titles, Los Matadores and Big E/Kofi Kingston wouldn’t be all that exciting, not hating just saying.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal: Konnor, Viktor, Kane, Big Show, Darren Young, Titus O’Neil, Jack Swagger, The Miz, Ryback, Curtis Axel, Fandango, Adam Rose, Zack Ryder, Erick Rowan, Sin Cara, Damien Sandow, Goldust, Mark Henry, Heath Slater, plus others TBA:

This match I see as a launching point for a Kane/Big Show feud in one corner, and in the other, a Miz/Damien Sandow feud.

Something they can play with on Monday night, and in the upcoming weeks, setting up for some big matches for their next pay-per-view.

The winner, I’m seeing Sheamus returning and winning the whole thing, why because stoned Mele says so!

WWE World Heavyweight Title Match: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns:

I think Lesnar will win this one, mainly because he’s the bigger name of the two, but I really hope I’m wrong because we really do need a new champion.

We need someone who will show up more often than Lesnar, he shows up less than a toothbrush in a trailer park does.

I must admit, I do have a bad feeling that Reigns will win and then Rollins will cash in his Money in the Bank contract and take it from him, an unnecessary twist that would be as lame and as predictable as Batista winning the 2014 Royal Rumble.

However, considering that the WWE Universe wasn’t all that pleased about Mr. Reigns having this opportunity in the first place, I can really see that happening…can you smell what I’m cooking.

WWE United States Title Match: Rusev vs. John Cena:

This one is playing out kind of like the Hulk Hogan/The Iron Sheik matches did back in the 80s, and unfortunately I think the end result will be very similar too, with Cena (the super patriot) coming away with the WWE United States Title.

Nothing all that thrilling here, a match made just to have Cena on the card to make all his “Cena Sucks/Let’s Go Cena” fanboys/girls happy and willing to shell out $9.99 for the WWE Network, not hating just saying.

…and please bring back Lana for this match, we um er miss her or something.

WWE Intercontinental Title Ladder Match: Dolph Ziggler vs. R-Truth vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper vs. Stardust vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett:

I’m thinking this is the WWE’s way of making up to their fans for the fact that Daniel Bryan didn’t win the Royal Rumble and go on to face Lesnar in the main event, but I do hope I’m wrong here.

I personally love Dean Ambrose, I think he is one of the most entertaining wrestlers to come along in quite some time, and with that said, I truly hope he wins and comes away with the title.

This is probably the match I’m most looking forward to, it just screams excitement and I’m positive it will be action-packed.  

Sting vs. Triple H:

I’ve been a fan of Sting since he first hit the scene back in the day, there was just something about him that drew me in.

During the Monday Night Wars I actually preferred WCW to WWE thanks to the whole NWO/Sting storyline, as I’m sure many of us wrestling fans did.

I hated the fact that when WWE won the war, he didn’t move over to WWE after the demise of the WCW, I could only imagine the great matches that we could have seen if he did.

I was such a fan of his that I actually, and very shamefully admit to, watched him on TNA, if that doesn’t prove my loyalty I don’t know what does.

I must say though I do like the angle they are working here, and I really hope that Triple H doesn’t win just because he is the company man, but considering some of the writing as of late I’m thinking that is exactly what we will see.

AJ Lee and Paige vs. The Bella Twins:

There’s a whole lot of sexy going on here, throw in some nighties and pillows and you’ll have every man’s wet dream.

In all seriousness, I want to see AJ Lee and Paige come away with a win here; I like their “Skip to my lou my crazy” and “The Glampire from across the ocean” gimmicks.

Nothing against The Bella Twins, I just don’t see what the big deal is about them; I think they’re a little overrated.

You can keep your Brie Mode nonsense.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton:

I enjoy Rollins; he makes a great heel, is an incredible wrestler and has awesome mic skills, but unfortunately because of how they choose to use him for Raw/ SmackDown, basically ramming him down our throats as if was Wild Bill and we were Monica Lewinsky, I’m tired of him.

Honestly I wouldn’t mind if he started keep Lesnar’s hours.

Let Orton win, allow him to beat Rollins down and make him his bitch as he promised, and then down the road he could make a huge comeback and win the WWE World Heavyweight championship.

We all know that this won’t happen though, especially considering that he’s Mr. Money in the Bank, but a fan can dream can’t he.

If anyone from the writing staff of the WWE is reading this, please hear my plea and get rid of J and J security, they seriously suck.

Do we want to see them gone? Yes! Yes! Yes!

Bray Wyatt vs. The Undertaker:

This is a match I’m really not looking forward to, and not because I don’t like the talent involved, because that couldn’t be further from the truth, but rather because I think it’s a match they threw together just to get Wyatt over.

With The Undertaker’s streak being broken at last year’s WrestleMania, there is really nothing left for him to fight for, so why not let Wyatt (the young blood) win and make a name for himself?

I’m not against a younger superstar getting a push, especially when they’ve earned it (i.e. Wyatt), but not at the expense of a past superstar who is way past his prime and should be kicking back and relaxing in Death Valley sipping on a Mai Tai.

Hopefully it’s not one of those Wyatt gets disqualified for acting a fool and no one really wins or loses, at least as far as the record books are concerned, because I really hate those kinds of matches.

The End

Well that’s all he wrote people, let’s hope for a great show and not a massive disappointment.

And remember kids, say your prayers, take your vitamins and you will never go wrong.

Oh yeah, don’t try this at home; I’m a trained professional.


Thursday, March 19, 2015

“Real American Heroes”

You may disagree with the war we are fighting and/or not be a big fan of the Commander-in-Chief, but don't let that taint your feelings towards the amazing men and women who give their all to serve and protect this great country of ours. Their actions warrant our love and support all the time and not just during designated holidays and/or when we as people feel the need to be patriotic, they deserve much better than that. They sacrifice so that we don’t have to, they keep a watchful eye so that we can rest peacefully and they diligently stand guard so that we can be at ease, just imagine what our lives would be like if they weren’t there.

“Forgot to Remember”…

It's easy to forget and to take for granted the many blessings that we have when we're not the ones on the front lines fighting the battle, but we must do our best to not let that happen and to always remember what we have and why we have it. We should salute our soldiers of the armed forces (past, present and future) every day, and thank them from the bottom of ours hearts for the freedoms, the rights and the peace of mind they have bestowed upon us, because without them none of that would be possible. Go out of your way to shake the hand of and/or to give a warm embrace to any person who has fought or is fighting for us and our country, show them that we appreciate it and that we are aware of their unselfish deeds.

“Foxtrot Alpha Mike India Lima Yankee”…

We must also not forget the families who are left behind when their significant other, their child/parent and/or their sibling decides to embark on this journey; they remain here with uncertainties as to what the future holds for them and their loved ones. These individuals proudly give so that we can be safeguarded, so that we can have confidence in knowing that everything will be alright and that the evils in this world would be kept at bay all thanks to the due diligence of their child/parent/sibling. They may lose a little piece of themselves in the process, but at the same time they gain a tremendous amount of respect and pride as a result of the actions and passion demonstrated by their soldiers. When you come across a family who has a loved one in the military, make sure to let them know that you recognize their sacrifice and that the absence of their family member weighs heavily upon us all. 

“The Military Machine”…

There are many components that allow this machine we know to function properly, and if we were to lose any part of it the whole thing would come crumbling down around us, so make sure to support and to show love to the fine men and women in uniform who make this world a safer place for us all. There is no amount of gratitude that we can express that is sufficient for all you have done for us and how we feel towards you as a person. With that said, I do want to thank you for your service, commitment and dedication to us and our country, I truly appreciate it and may God bless you all.

“Got Your 6”…

Keep in mind that some of our soldiers need more than a friendly gesture and/or an American flag flying outside your house. They need jobs, medical attention and/or a roof over their heads. They shouldn’t have to come back to our country, especially after everything they’ve done to keep it “our” country, to have to struggle just to survive. There is absolutely no justification for this and it is completely ridiculous and disgraceful to say the least. They fought for our lives, so the least we could do is fight for theirs. 

“A Personal Message to Our Soldiers”…

I have never served, so I wouldn’t even pretend to understand what it’s like to walk a mile in your boots, but I just wanted to share a personal experience that may be helpful to some of you. I have been down and out. I have been so low that I had to look up to see bottom. I felt like at the time, that the only way to find peace was to end it all. I can’t claim that our journeys took the same path, but I can promise you that you’re not alone and that help is out there. The trail may not be the easiest to travel through, but it is totally worth making the effort. You are worth it, and so are your family and friends. 



Please check out the links below, and if possible contribute to their causes, because you may feel that it doesn’t affect you directly, but trust me it does. They have scratched our backs, so now it’s time we scratch theirs.

(These are only a few charities, there are many more who would benefit greatly from your generosity) 

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

“Take a Turn for the Worse”

I awoke suddenly and knew right away something was wrong; just as Dorothy could tell that she wasn’t in Kansas anymore, I could tell that I wasn’t in my nice warm bed all snuggly under the covers.

Wherever I was it was cold and hard, comparable to one of those metal slabs in the morgue, but thankfully that was the only similarity I shared with those stiffs.

Everything was all fuzzy and unclear, I had no idea what was going on or why I was where I was, I was completely lost like the kid on the back of the milk carton.

I went to stand up so that I could better assess the situation, find out what was going on and figure things out.

However, standing wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be, it was as if none of my limbs were working accordingly and it took a whole lot more effort than it usually does to get them to perform as they should.

Making it to me feet was only half the battle, because once I got myself upright I had to make sure I could keep myself that way and not end up falling down similar to a drunk who just left the bar after last call.

I could feel myself swaying back and forth; it was as if I was on a boat in the middle of the ocean during a bad storm, it was almost impossible to get my bearings.

I was finally able to compose myself; I was able to stand without toppling over like a Jenga tower whose player had Parkinson's disease.   

I could now see that I was outside, in the middle of a field somewhere, and I couldn’t really tell what time it was but I knew it was late because the sun was nowhere to be found.

I attempted to start walking, thinking I could find someone that could tell me what was going on.

But my legs felt limp and numb, like the circulation had been cut off from them for quite some time, they were as useless to me as cinderblock shoes would be to a late night swimmer…isn’t that right mafia.

I just couldn’t lift them up; I could only slowly drag them along, my feet felt as though they weighed a ton, the ground was metal and they were magnets.

Knowing that at this rate I wouldn’t be getting anywhere fast, I decided to scream out for help, but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn’t get any actually words out of my mouth, only grunts and gargles.

Now being even more confused, I just stood there still and lifeless, equivalent to a scarecrow watching over its field.

And then all of the sudden my pondering was rudely interrupted by a loud growl that was coming from my belly, my tummy was in turmoil and needed to be fed, kind of took me by surprise considering the situation but what can I say, the stomach wants what the stomach wants.

So again I started moving forward, dragging my legs behind me like they were two dead bodies.

I wasn’t sure where I was going, or even what was happening, I just knew I had to eat something soon because my hunger was growing and becoming more savage by the minute.

I couldn’t explain it, I was really hungry but what I was craving wasn’t of the traditional sense, at least for me it wasn’t.   

I wanted flesh, and not the flesh of a chicken, cow or even that of the scrumptious pig, but I wanted human flesh, fresh off the bone, it was as if the spirit of Jeffrey Dahmer consumed me and was now in charge of my appetite.

I didn’t want it served to me either, my primal instincts kicked in and I wanted to hunt it, because you know like they say, the greater the struggle, the sweeter the meat.

I know it’s against the moral code and everything we stand for, but I can’t help it I’m craving a people pot pie and unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be anything I can do about it, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach…or so I’ve been told.

I was as agile as a cat, Garfield the cat to be exact, but I knew that if I kept at it and didn’t give up that I would eventually catch my prey and be able to enjoy a nice yummy meal.

You don’t always need to be a cannibalistic ninja to eat well, us slow and steady types can handle our own, don’t believe me just check out Mr. Jason Voorhees, that dude never breaks a sweat and always catches his prize in the end.

At first I thought I was drugged, somebody roofied with the hopes of having a good time with my lifeless body, but then it came to me, I was a zombie (or a walker if you want to be hip).

As I said prior, I wasn’t really quite sure how it happened; I was obviously once fully alive and now somehow became deader than a doornail and in the process caught the zombie flu, and as a result of that I was now one of the living dead; I was able to survive just about anything except a blow to the dome.

So with that being said, the first order of business (after finding a meal of course) was to find myself and nice strong helmet to protect my melon.

I’m putting that on my bucket list, and using that same bucket to carry around all my appendages that fall and/or that are ripped off.

I’m also not sure if it would be considered necrophilia or not, because I am living and I am dead so it’s difficult to tell, but I would want to get some booty before I finally kick said bucket…that is as long as I don’t lose my pecker anytime during my travels.

Was being a zombie really all that bad, was it truly a turn for the worse, I mean aside from my limps falling off as if they were just taped on and the inconsolable hunger for braaaaaaaaaaaaains was it the worst thing that’s ever happened to me, not by a long shot?

Sure my body is decaying similar to the teeth of a meth addict, my skin feels identical to Jello and my face looks like it was on fire and someone put it out with a bag of dimes, but there’s always plastic surgery…am I right?

I can feel my intelligence slowly starting to slip away, like sands through an hourglass or our hopes and dreams through our elected officials, so let me wrap this up before I’m brain dead and surviving on instincts alone, kind of like Kanye West.

It’s now time for me to skedaddle and to be on my way, and if I happen to run into you on my journey please forgive me if I take a bite out of you as if you were crime and I was McGruff the Crime Dog.


Wednesday, March 4, 2015

“From Madrid with Love”

Guess what party people; The Nerdy Side of Life has a very special guest for you today!

She’s hotter than a habanero, cooler than a cucumber and it’s her life’s work to scare the shit out of you, and she does it well.

She’s an actress, a writer, a producer and Spain’s greatest export since, well forever.

Please show some mad love to Mari Cielo Pajares!

Sit right back a check out what she has to say in regards to her best assets, her thoughts on the genre as a whole and her upcoming projects...and fellas please keep your pants on when reading this, not hating just saying.

(Please remember there is a little bit of a language barrier, so keep that in mind when you’re reading)

1. What projects are you currently working on, and when can we expect to see them?

Right now I have 4 going on. 1st one is a short film, 1 location 1 actor & 1 shocking ending. 2nd is a pilot of a horror/thriller anthology series I want to shoot probably at the end of this year. 3rd I'll be starring the feature film "ObsesiĆ³n Sangrienta" from Spaniard director Ruben Dos Santos in October. The 4th one I'm not allowed to talk about it yet but I promise I'll be around in your blog to tell you all about it as soon as I have the green light!

2. We’ve all heard of women using their sex appeal to get them out of trouble, so we were wondering if you have, and what was the situation?

I never considered myself sexy. I think when we women try to dress or act sexy, this behavior is part of a complex, in my opinion we try to overcome this complex by over exposing, I do have a lot of complex.

Now to use sex or sensuality to be able to achieve something in my moral code I would consider that prostitution. I never used it for my benefit, I get sexy with the man that I feel attracted to, and I don't like to send mixed signals, if I like a man he will know.

3. How do you feel about the horror genre as a whole?

Passionate will be the word if I have to choose one. I'm not a fan of gore though. I like the kind of horror that can terrify you with no need of showing guts. If you can make the audience tremble with a situation, surprise and scare them with no need of sever sfx you have a great script in my humbled opinion.

4. How would you describe yourself, a sex symbol, a seductive sultress or a prude princess?

None of the above.

I'm a human being with needs. I'm 38 years old now. When I was young I was wilder, I was trying to make a point, over exposed, mark my territory and demand freedom by dressing a little too sexy or even been in the cover of a magazines.

As I said before, being a person with a complex made you make a lot of mistakes, then when you are older you realize it’s nonsense and you care very little about what the people think about you. You just care about being honest to others and what is most important, to yourself.

5. Who in Hollywood would you like to work with, and why?

I would give almost anything to be directed as an actress by M. Night Shyamalan. I would love to direct Joaquin Phoenix and Daniel Kaluuya (Black Mirror). I would also be thrilled to write & produced for Syfy.

6. Video games, an immature kid’s toy or a great way to pass time and kill some mutha fugging zombies?

How people entertain themselves and search for a good time and happiness is NEVER immature. We are in this life for a minute, if you waste your time judging others or forcing yourself to do what others would call "mature" good luck been an unhappy m....f.... Personally I'm weird, I'm a HUGE fan of Resident Evil saga and God of War, but I do like to read ANY book about Mythology I find (Greek, Egyptian, Nordic...ANY!).

7. What are some of your favorite movies/television shows, books and/or bands today?

I have such a large list that I will bore you to death, but if I have just to choose a couple TV shows: "Supernatural", "Helix", "American Horror Story" Netflix: "Hemlock Grove" and "House of Cards". Books: "Full Dark No Stars" and "Bulfinch's Mythology" Bands: (I'm soooo classic) I like Billy Idol when I feel happy happy joy joy and to encourage myself, Mozart and Bach when I want to relax, concentrate, focus or just suck the pain of something.

8. When in danger you become an ass kicking badass like Ronda Rousey, or a helpless damsel in distress like in one of those lame animated Disney movies?

I always been a bad ass, sometimes to the point that my ego writes checks that my muscles can't afford, but to be REALLY honest the one time I had to be strong was when they found a lump in my breast and they had to do a biopsy and I behaved like a little scared kid, showing to myself I'm not all that tough. Thankfully it was benign, but I learned a lot about myself, I probably don't like me, but I accept me how I am.

9. Proud to be indie, or one day do you hope to make it mainstream?

Who tells you that they don't want the budget of The Lord if the Rings for their production is a LIAR!!! One thing I adore from being indie is the fight. Is SO HARD to make a project happen that when you finally do it, you feel like you just sat your ass in the F.... throne of Game of Thrones! You taste the victory sooooo good! Just the fact of making a production happen as an indie is a victory!

Another thing that I like is the crowdfunding campaigns, before the audience was forced to watch whatever some rich people wish to produce at that moment, today people have a voice! If you like a project you donate for that campaign and help making happen whatever you want to see produced!

The audience has the force not only some privilege ones.

10. One night alone with any person, or if you’re feeling a little frisky, any people in the world, who would it be?  

I like to have my privacy in this point, I do have a couple but in case I wouldn't have it, I don't think it would be prudent to answer this question in an interview, my chances of making that dream a reality would decrease a LOT.

Well there you have it you freaks, Mari Cielo Pajares unplugged and wide open like a good book for all to read. I hope you enjoyed what she had to say and please make sure to show her some love on Twitter @MCpajares and see what’s she’s been up to by clicking here.

Her latest endeavor, a sci-fi suspense/thriller TV series called STYX! Sounds awesome, right? She needs your help with making it a reality, so check it out and see what you can do. Every little bit helps! Don't worry if you can't donate, because you can always help by simply spreading the word.